mtg.wtf

Haste
Whenever Toralf's Disciple attacks, conjure four cards named Lightning Bolt into your library, then shuffle.

Equipped creature has "{1}{R}, {T}, Unattach Toralf's Hammer: It deals 3 damage to any target. Return Toralf's Hammer to its owner's hand."
Equipped creature gets +3/+0 as long as it's legendary.
Equip {1}{R}

Trample
Whenever a creature or planeswalker an opponent controls is dealt excess noncombat damage, Toralf deals damage equal to the excess to any target other than that permanent.

If a red source you control would deal damage to an opponent or a permanent an opponent controls, it deals that much damage plus 2 instead.

This spell costs {2} less to cast if it targets a blue permanent.
This spell can't be countered.
Torch Breath deals X damage to target creature or planeswalker.

Haste
Sacrifice this creature: Another target creature gains haste until end of turn.

{R}, Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target artifact.

Equipped creature gets +2/+0.
Equip {2}

Kicker {1}{R}
When this creature enters, if it was kicked, it deals 2 damage to target creature.

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may put a verse counter on this enchantment.
{2}{R}, Sacrifice this enchantment: It deals X damage to any target, where X is the number of verse counters on this enchantment.

Bargain
Torch the Tower deals 2 damage to target creature or planeswalker. If this spell was bargained, instead it deals 3 damage to that permanent and you scry 1.
If a permanent dealt damage by Torch the Tower would die this turn, exile it instead.

Torch the Witness deals twice X damage to target creature. If excess damage was dealt to that creature this way, investigate.

{R}: Untap this creature.
{R}: Target creature blocks this creature this turn if able.
{R}: Change the target of target spell that targets only this creature.
{1}: This creature gets +1/-1 until end of turn.
{1}: This creature gets -1/+1 until end of turn.

Whenever you cast your first Human creature spell each turn, that creature enters with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each Dog and/or Wolf you control.
{T}: Add one mana of any color.

At the beginning of each upkeep, if no spells were cast last turn, transform this creature.

As an additional cost to cast this spell, discard a card.
Draw two cards.

When this creature enters, choose one —
• Target creature gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
• Target creature gets -0/-2 until end of turn.

Equipped creature gets +1/+1.
Whenever equipped creature becomes blocked, it deals 1 damage to defending player.
Equip {1}

Equipped creature gets +3/+0 and attacks each combat if able.
Equip {3}

{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Exile target player's graveyard.

Vigilance
{T}, Sacrifice this creature: Exile target player's graveyard.

Tap up to two Heads. They don't untap during the Hydra's next untap step. Torn Between Heads deals 5 damage to each player.

Cumulative upkeep {G}
{2}{G}, Pay 3 life for each velocity counter on this enchantment: Destroy target permanent and put a velocity counter on this enchantment. Activate only once each turn.

When this creature enters, it deals 6 damage to each creature with flying.
You may have this creature assign its combat damage as though it weren't blocked.

Defender
Sacrifice three lands: This creature loses defender until end of turn.