mtg.wtf

Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has first strike.
Equip {2}

Counter target spell.
Gotcha — If an opponent says "spell" or "counter," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Spell Counter from your graveyard to your hand.

Counter target spell, then assemble a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Flying, deathtouch
Whenever Spelling Bee deals combat damage to a player, that player looks at the top card of your library and chooses a word on that card. You spell that word. If you spell it correctly, draw a card. Otherwise, scry 1.

Return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.
Spellmorph {B} (You may cast this card face down as a 2/2 creature for {3}. Cast it any time for its spellmorph cost.)

({B/P} can be paid with either {B} or 2 life.)
{B/P}{B/P}{B/P}{B/P}: Reveal a card you own from outside the game that has been banned or restricted in a Constructed format and put it into your hand.

When Spirit of the Season enters the battlefield, it gains haste if it's summer. Put a +1/+1 counter on it if it's autumn. You gain 5 life if it's winter. If it's spring, search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Shuffle all cards in the game together and deal them into three decks. The game continues with a new player.

When Split Screen enters the battlefield, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it.
Play with your libraries' top cards revealed.
When Split Screen leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.

Flying
Whenever Spy Eye deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card from that player's library.

When Squidnapper enters the battlefield, gain control of target creature an opponent controls until Squidnapper leaves the battlefield or that player pays the ransom.
Ransom — {6} and 2 life

When Squirrel Dealer enters the battlefield, ask a person outside the game "Do you like Squirrels?" If they do, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.

{1}{G}: Reveal a card in your hand, covering the artist credit. Target opponent guesses the artist. If they guess wrong, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.

Visit — You have five seconds to stack dice on top of one another. If you stack at least five dice, claim the prize!
Prize — Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token for each die you stack above the fourth, then sacrifice Squirrel Stack and open an Attraction.

Increase the result of each die you roll by 2.

When Stack of Paperwork enters the battlefield, draw a card.
Combat damage uses the stack. (Combat damage assignment can be responded to before damage is dealt.)

As Staff of the Letter Magus enters the battlefield, choose a consonant other than N, R, S, or T.
Whenever a player casts a spell, you gain 1 life for each time the chosen letter appears in that spell's name.

As Stamp of Approval enters the battlefield, choose a watermark.
Creatures you control with the chosen watermark get +1/+1.

{1}, Reveal Standard Procedure from your hand: Choose an instant or sorcery card with mana value 3 or less currently legal in the Standard format. Standard Procedure becomes that card until end of turn.

As long as you're standing, Standing Army has vigilance.

Create two 1/1 white Warrior creature tokens with vigilance.

"Until end of turn" and "this turn" effects don't end.

Deathtouch
When Steady-Handed Mook enters the battlefield, it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

{5}:
Augment {4} ({4}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Whenever another Goblin enters the battlefield under your control, you may pay {1}. If you do, Steamflogger Service Rep assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)