mtg.wtf

{T}: Add {G}{G}.
Whenever a nontoken creature enters the battlefield under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on it.

Choose a scheme and set it into motion —
• Choose Your Demise
• Every Hope Shall Vanish
• Make Yourself Useful

Other Lizards, Treefolk, And Warriors you control get +2/+2.
Whenever The Ash Lizard attacks, create a token that's a copy of one of the following cards at random: Ash Zealot; Bog-Strider Ash; Grotag ThrASHer; Seedguide Ash; Unstoppable Ash; ViASHino Warrior. (You're probably going to need to look these cards up.)

Any time a player would pay a mana cost for anything, it costs {1} more mana to activate. (This includes casting spells, activating abilities, turning face-down creatures face up, paying for Ghostly Prison, the weird ability on Quenchable Fire, etc.)

{3}, {T}: Target creature you control gains deathtouch until end of turn.

(As a Siege enters, choose an opponent to protect it. You and others can attack it. When it's defeated, exile it, then cast it transformed.)
When The Battle of Dragon Brothers Enters, choose Bolas or Ugin.
• Bolas — Destroy all creatures.
• Ugin — Manifest the top three cards of your library.

Whenever you planeswalk here, each player chooses a creature they control and creates a token copy of it. It's a reflection in addition to its other types, and its power and toughness are inverted.
Whenever Chaos ensues, create a token that's a copy of a creature you control. It's a reflection in addition to its other types, and its power and toughness are inverted.

When The Bear Force Pilot enters the battlefield, create a 0/0 colorless artifact Vehicle token with flying, "This creature gets +1/+1 for each Bear you control," and crew 2.

When The Bear Force Pilot Runner enters, create a 0/0 colorless Vehicle artifact token with flying, "This creature gets +1/+1 for each Bear you control," and crew 2.
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

When you cast this spell, gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap it. It gains menace and haste until end of turn.
The Beast enters tapped with six stun counters on it.
Whenever a creature deals combat damage to its owner, untap The Beast and draw a card.

The Beleaguered Boxer can't be your Commander unless your deck is 100 cards and originally built out of no more than 36 booster packs, plus basic lands.
When The Beleaguered Boxer enters the battlefield, open a Magic booster pack. Remove up to three cards in your hand or graveyard from your deck permanently. For each card removed this way, add a card from that pack to your hand. Those cards are now permanently part of your deck.

({T}: Add {U}.)
The Belligerent and Useless Island enter the battlefield tapped.
When The Belligerent and Useless Island deal combat damage to a player or battle, draw a card, then discard a card.
Crew 2

{2}{B/R}{B/R}, {T}: Roll a six-sided die. Create a number of 1/1 red Brainiac creature tokens equal to the result.
Tap three untapped Brainiacs you control: The next time you would roll a six-sided die, instead roll two six-sided dice and use the total of those results.

{T}: Add one mana of any color that appears on your top. (A top is an outerwear garment worn on the upper body.)

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +1/+0.
{R}{R}{R}: Regenerate enchanted creature.

When The Bus Runner enters, create a 4/4 Desert Vehicle artifact land token with crew 2. Put eight hour counters on it. It has "{T}: Add {C}" and "Whenever this token or a Gamer you control becomes tapped, remove an hour counter from this token. Then if it has no hour counters on it, each opponent loses 1 life, you gain 1 life, and put eight hour counters on this token."
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

Whenever the The Caffeinated Runner enters or attacks, create a Food token.
Sacrifice a Food: Target creature gains haste until end of turn. Whenever it next becomes tapped this turn, untap it.
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

Creature spells you cast from your hand have blitz {3}.
Whenever chaos ensues, return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Each creature card in your graveyard has scavenge. The scavenge cost is equal to its mana cost.
Whenever chaos ensues, create two 1/1 white Warrior creature tokens.

I — Put two stun counters on each of up to two target tapped creatures.
II, III — For each non-Saga permanent, choose a counter on it. You may put an additional counter of that kind on that permanent.
IV — Search your library for a Doctor card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Whenever The Celestial Toymaker attacks, look at the top three cards of your library. Exile any number of them in a face-down pile and the rest in a face-up pile. Defending player chooses one of those piles. Put that pile into your hand.
At the beginning of each end step, each opponent loses 2 life for each spell or ability that caused one or more players to guess or to group cards or permanents into a pile this turn.

{2}, {T}, Exile The Champion: Search your library for a legendary artifact card that isn't a creature, reveal it, and put it onto the battlefield. Then shuffle your library.

The Chaos Keeper enters with a sealed Magic booster pack of your choice under it. (You provide a new pack each time.)
Whenever The Chaos Keeper deals combat damage to a player, reveal its cards and put one of them into your hand. (Don't open the booster pack until the first time this ability reolves.)

When you control no permanents other than The Cheese Stands Alone and have no cards in hand, you win the game.

When you planeswalk to The Cheetah Planet and at the beginning of your upkeep, put two +1/+1 counters on target non-Cat creature you control. It becomes a Cat in addition to its other types.
Whenever chaos ensues, all Cats gain provoke until end of turn.