mtg.wtf

This enchantment enters with three resonance counters on it.
Whenever you cast a spell, you may remove a resonance counter from this enchantment. If you do, ask a person outside the game if the spell's name sounds like a non-Magic themed movie title. When a person answers yes, choose one —
• Put two +1/+1 counters on target creature.
• This enchantment deals 2 damage to target creature.
When this enchantment has no counters on it, sacrifice it.

You gain 3 life. Draw three cards. Add {B}{B}{B}. This spell deals 3 damage to any target. Target creature gets +3/+3 until end of turn.

Once per turn, you may cast a nonland card as though it was another card of your choice with the same mana cost. You can't choose the same card twice. (Mana cost includes color. No looking cards up!)

While it's October 25th, 2024, whenever you cast your commander, create a token that's a copy of it except it isn't legendary.
While it's October 26th or 27th, 2024, if one or more tokens would be created under your control, instead twice that many tokens are created and each of them enters with a +1/+1 counter on it.
On any other date, both abilities apply. (Because why not?)

Add {B}{B}{B}.
If this card is signed by someone who has ever designed a Magic card, treat all black mana symbols on this card as red mana symbols. (To be respectful of the color pie.)

Oozeavite enters with each of a vigilance, reach, trample, and hexproof counter on it. These are also +1/+1 counters.
If Oozeavite would be dealt damage, instead create a 0/0 green Ooze creature token and move a counter from Oozeavite onto it. Then if Oozeavite has no counters on it, sacrifice it.
{3}{G}, {T}: Move any number of counters from other creatures you control onto Oozeavite.

Whenever you cast a spell with a keyword or ability word, if it doesn't share a keyword or ability word with a permanent you control or a card in your graveyard, draw a card. (Keywords and ability words include abilities like flying, flashback, and landfall.)

This creature enters with two cage counters on it.
This creature can't attack or block as long as it has a cage counter on it.
At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a cage counter from this creature. When the last cage counter is removed this way, destroy target creature an opponent controls.

Double all your spells and abilities. (All spells and abilities cast, activated, or triggered by you are copied. Mana abilities produce twice as much mana.)

{2}, {T}: Reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a nonland card. You may erase any number of words on the card, including flavor text, as long as the card still makes sense. Then cast the revised card without paying its mana cost. Put all other cards revealed this way on the bottom of your library in a random order.

All creatures are legendary.
Creatures with a black or silver expansion symbol get +1/+1.
Creatures without a black or silver expansion symbol get +2/+2.

At the beginning of your first main phase, read aloud the name, mana cost, type line, power, and toughness of a card in your hand, except lie about one of them. Each opponent simultaneously guesses which one is incorrect. Then reveal the card. Each opponent who guessed incorrectly loses 3 life. You may discard that card and draw a card. (They can't look it up or ask for help as this ability is resolving. Nice try, though.)

Choose a scheme and set it into motion —
• Choose Your Demise
• Every Hope Shall Vanish
• Make Yourself Useful

When The Bear Force Pilot Runner enters, create a 0/0 colorless Vehicle artifact token with flying, "This creature gets +1/+1 for each Bear you control," and crew 2.
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

When The Bus Runner enters, create a 4/4 Desert Vehicle artifact land token with crew 2. Put eight hour counters on it. It has "{T}: Add {C}" and "Whenever this token or a Gamer you control becomes tapped, remove an hour counter from this token. Then if it has no hour counters on it, each opponent loses 1 life, you gain 1 life, and put eight hour counters on this token."
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

Whenever the The Caffeinated Runner enters or attacks, create a Food token.
Sacrifice a Food: Target creature gains haste until end of turn. Whenever it next becomes tapped this turn, untap it.
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

The Chaos Keeper enters with a sealed Magic booster pack of your choice under it. (You provide a new pack each time.)
Whenever The Chaos Keeper deals combat damage to a player, reveal its cards and put one of them into your hand. (Don't open the booster pack until the first time this ability reolves.)

At the beginning of each player's upkeep, create a 1/1 blue Serpent creature token named Cobra Coil. When you do, if you control five or more Snakes and/or Serpents, choose one —
• Strike first — Target Snake or Serpent you control fights target creature an opponent controls.
• Strike hard — Put a +1/+1 counter on each Snake and Serpent you control.

You may have The Cosplayzer enter as a copy of any creature on the battlefield, except it has "The first time each turn an ability of this creature is activated or triggered, copy it. You may choose new targets for the copy" and the first letter of its name is Z. (This is both stylish AND makes it a different name for the legend rule!)

Spells you cast that would counter a spell cost {U}{U} less to cast.
Whenever a spell an opponent controls is countered by a spell or ability you control, draw a card. The Countering Runner deals 2 psychic damage to that player. (Psychic damage doesn't cause loss of life, but a player who's been dealt 20 psychic damage loses the game.)
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

If The Covert Blue Mage is your commander, your starting deck can contain any number of cards beyond the maximum deck size. (For example, your deck can be 120 cards.)
When The Covert Blue Mage enters, create a colorless Equipment artifact token named Covert Sunglasses. It has "Equipped creature can't be blocked" and equip {2}{W/U}.

Flying, split second level up {2}{U} ({2}{U}: Put a level counter on this. Level up only as a sorcery. This can't be responded to.)
LEVEL 1-3
3/3
Flying
Whenever The Fearsome Flock deals combat damage to a player, gain control of target noncreature artifact that player controls. It becomes a Treasure.
LEVEL 4+
3/4
Flying
You may activate abilities of artifacts your opponents control as though you control them.

Before the game begins, if The Fifth Alias is your commander or in your deck, secretly make a list of five nonland cards in your deck. (Don't forget to do this!)
As you draw a card on your list, you may reveal it, show it was on the list, and exclaim its name. If you do, cast it without paying its mana cost.

Ew-minance — When The Gunky Runner enters and at the beginning of the first upkeep in a game where it's your commander, shuffle three Gunk cards into each opponent's library. (Gunk is a colorless sorcery card with no mana cost and cycling {4}.)
Whenever an opponent loses life, they shuffle that many Gunk cards into their library.
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)

When The Highland Runner enters and at the beginning of the first upkeep in a game where it's your commander, you may have each player's life total become 20. If you do, each of your commanders stop being commanders this game. Shuffle them into your library. (They no longer go to the command zone.)
Ready to run (You can have two commanders if both have ready to run.)