mtg.wtf

{W}{W}: Fascist Art Director gains protection from the artist of your choice until end of turn.

Fat Ass gets +2/+2 and has trample as long as you're eating. (Gum isn't food. We checked.)

When this creature enters the battlefield, roll a six-sided die. This creature deals damage equal to the result to target creature an opponent controls.

Destroy target creature, then assemble a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Each attacking or blocking creature with the lowest collector number among attacking or blocking creatures has first strike.

Destroy target artifact or enchantment. Assemble a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Put target nonland permanent into your hand. You may spend mana as though it were mana of any color the next time you cast that card.

Counter target spell unless its controller pays {3}{½}.

{T}: Choose target spell or ability that targets a permanent you control. Then ask a person outside the game if the story of what will happen makes sense. If they say no, sacrifice Flavor Judge and counter that spell or ability.

Flip X coins. For each flip you win, create a 2/2 green Sheep creature token named Rabid Sheep.

Defender, flying
{1}, {T}: Put a +1/+1 counter on each creature with a tail target player controls. Stare down up to one target creature until end of turn.

As Form of the Squirrel enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token. You lose the game when that creature leaves the battlefield.
Creatures can't attack you.
You have shroud.
You can't cast spells.

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature loses all abilities and is a Bird creature with base power and toughness 1/1.

{G}, {T}: Return target card with a ½ on it from your graveyard to your hand.

Choose an artist. Tap all untapped permanents with art by that artist or untap all tapped permanents with art by that artist.

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player answers the question truthfully and abides by that answer if able until end of turn.

Protection from wordy (Something is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)

{1}{G}: Roll two six-sided dice. If both results are the same, Free-Range Chicken gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is that result. If the total of those results is equal to any other total you have rolled this turn for this ability, sacrifice it. (For example, if you roll two 3s, it gets +3/+3. If you roll a 4 and a 2 for this ability later that turn, sacrifice it.)

When Free-for-All enters the battlefield, exile all creatures face down.
At the beginning of each player's upkeep, that player chooses a card exiled with Free-for-All at random and puts it onto the battlefield.
When Free-for-All leaves the battlefield, put all cards exiled with it into their owners' graveyards.

Fruitcake Elemental is indestructible.
At the end of your turn, Fruitcake Elemental deals 7 damage to you.
{3}: Target player gains control of Fruitcake Elemental.

When GO TO JAIL enters the battlefield, exile target creature an opponent controls until GO TO JAIL leaves the battlefield.
At the beginning of the upkeep of the exiled card's owner, that player rolls two six-sided dice. If they roll doubles, sacrifice GO TO JAIL.

Frenzy 2 (Whenever this creature attacks and isn't blocked, it gets +2/+0 until end of turn.)
Garbage Elemental can't be blocked by wordy creatures. (A creature is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)

When Garbage Elemental enters the battlefield, it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)
Undying (When this creature dies, if it had no +1/+1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control with a +1/+1 counter on it.)

Battle cry (Whenever this creature attacks, each other attacking creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn.)
When Garbage Elemental enters the battlefield, roll two six-sided dice. Create a number of 1/1 red Goblin creature tokens equal to the difference between those results.

Cascade (When you cast this spell, exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card that costs less. You may cast it without paying its mana cost. Put the exiled cards on the bottom of your library in a random order.)
When Garbage Elemental enters the battlefield, roll a six-sided die. Garbage Elemental deals damage equal to the result to target opponent or planeswalker.