29693 cards found
The Fallen Apart {2}{B}{B}
Creature - Zombie
The Fallen Apart enters the battlefield with two arms and two legs.
Whenever damage is dealt to The Fallen Apart, remove an arm or a leg from it.
The Fallen Apart can't attack if it has no legs and can't block if it has no arms.
Whenever damage is dealt to The Fallen Apart, remove an arm or a leg from it.
The Fallen Apart can't attack if it has no legs and can't block if it has no arms.
4/4
- Unhinged
Time Machine {5}
Artifact
{T}: Exile Time Machine and target nontoken creature you own. Return them to the battlefield at the beginning of your upkeep on your turn X in the next game you play with one of your opponents in this game, where X is the mana value of the exiled creature.
- Unhinged — 128 128★
Togglodyte {3}
Artifact Creature - Golem
Togglodyte enters the battlefield turned on.
Whenever a player casts a spell, toggle Togglodyte's ON/OFF switch.
As long as Togglodyte is turned off, it can't attack or block, and prevent all damage it would deal.
Whenever a player casts a spell, toggle Togglodyte's ON/OFF switch.
As long as Togglodyte is turned off, it can't attack or block, and prevent all damage it would deal.
4/4
- Unhinged
Touch and Go {3}{R}
Sorcery
Destroy target land.
Gotcha — If an opponent touches their face, you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Touch and Go from your graveyard to your hand.
Gotcha — If an opponent touches their face, you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Touch and Go from your graveyard to your hand.
Judge's ruling: The interior of the face still counts as the face, so a nose-pick is legitimate grounds for saying "Gotcha!"
- Unhinged — 90 90★
Toy Boat {3}
Artifact Creature - Ship
Cumulative upkeep—Say "Toy Boat" quickly. (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on Toy Boat, then sacrifice it unless you say "Toy Boat" once for each age counter on it—without pausing between or fumbling it.)
3/3
- Unhinged
Uktabi Kong {5}{G}{G}{G}
Creature - Ape
Trample
When Uktabi Kong enters the battlefield, destroy all artifacts.
Tap two untapped Apes you control: Create a 1/1 green Ape creature token.
When Uktabi Kong enters the battlefield, destroy all artifacts.
Tap two untapped Apes you control: Create a 1/1 green Ape creature token.
"I desire the acquisition of a potassium-rich fruit comestible of substantial magnitude."
8/8
- Unhinged
Urza's Hot Tub {2}
Artifact
{2}, Discard a card: Search your library for a card that shares a complete word in its name with the discarded card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.
www.wizards.com/hottub
- Unhinged
Vile Bile {1}{B}
Creature - Ooze
Whenever a player's skin or fingernail touches Vile Bile, that player loses 2 life.
2½/2½
- Unhinged
Wet Willie of the Damned {2}{B}{B}
Sorcery
Wet Willie of the Damned deals 2½ damage to any target and you gain 2½ life.
Ever the warrior, Glissa responded with a "wedgie from beyond Uranus."
- Unhinged
When Fluffy Bunnies Attack {3}{B}
Instant
Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the number of times the letter of your choice appears in that creature's name.
"Get it? Bunnies, letters, -X/-X? Me neither."
—Bucky, flavor text writer
—Bucky, flavor text writer
- Unhinged — 67 67★
Wordmail {W}
Enchantment - Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each word in its name.
Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each word in its name.
"Suck on it, Stangg!"
—Sol'kanar the Swamp King
—Sol'kanar the Swamp King
- Unhinged
Working Stiff {1}{B}
Creature - Mummy
As Working Stiff enters the battlefield, straighten your arms.
When you bend an elbow, sacrifice Working Stiff.
When you bend an elbow, sacrifice Working Stiff.
Oh, does your nose itch?
2/2
- Unhinged
World-Bottling Kit {5}
Artifact
{5}, Sacrifice World-Bottling Kit: Choose a Magic set. Exile all permanents with that set's expansion symbol except for basic lands.
YOUR AD HERE
- Unhinged
Zombie Fanboy {2}{B}
Creature - Zombie Gamer
As Zombie Fanboy enters the battlefield, choose an artist.
Whenever a permanent with art by the chosen artist is put into a graveyard, put two +1/+1 counters on Zombie Fanboy.
Whenever a permanent with art by the chosen artist is put into a graveyard, put two +1/+1 counters on Zombie Fanboy.
The real advantage of being a zombie gamer? No one notices the stench.
1/1
- Unhinged
Zzzyxas's Abyss {1}{B}{B}
Enchantment
At the beginning of your upkeep, destroy all nonland permanents with the first name alphabetically among nonland permanents.
Tired of always being picked last, the wizard Zzzyxas created the ultimate revenge.
- Unhinged
_____ {1}{U}
Creature - Shapeshifter
{1}: This card's name becomes the card name of your choice. Activate anywhere, anytime.
{1}: This card's flavor text becomes the flavor text of your choice. (This ability doesn't work because it's flavor text, not rules text (but neither does this reminder text, so you figure it out).)
1/1
- Unhinged
Ashnod's Coupon {0}
Artifact
{T}, Sacrifice Ashnod's Coupon: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.
Limited time offer. Void where prohibited. Limit one per purchase. Valid only in participating duels. This coupon is nontransferable and invalid if shattered, crumbled, detonated, pillaged, or otherwise disenchanted. Cash value less than 1/20 of a cent. Offer not valid in Quebec, Rhode Island, or where prohibited by law or the DCI.
- Arena League 2004
- Unglued
Akroma, Angel of Wrath Avatar
Vanguard
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under your control, it gains two abilities chosen at random from flying, first strike, trample, haste, protection from black, protection from red, and vigilance.
Hand size bonus:
+1
Life bonus:
+7
- Magic Online Avatars
Arcanis, the Omnipotent Avatar
Vanguard
{X}, Return a creature you control with mana value X to its owner's hand: Draw a number of cards chosen at random between 0 and X. X can't be 0.
Hand size bonus:
+1
Life bonus:
-3
- Magic Online Avatars
Arcbound Overseer Avatar
Vanguard
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may put a charge counter on target permanent you control.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may put a charge counter on target permanent you control.
Hand size bonus:
+0
Life bonus:
+3
- Magic Online Avatars
Ashling the Pilgrim Avatar
Vanguard
{2}: Ashling the Pilgrim Avatar deals 1 damage to each creature and each player.
Hand size bonus:
-1
Life bonus:
+6
- Magic Online Avatars
Ashling, the Extinguisher Avatar
Vanguard
{5}: Destroy all nonland permanents. Activate only once and only during your turn.
Hand size bonus:
+1
Life bonus:
-3
- Magic Online Avatars
Birds of Paradise Avatar
Vanguard
Lands you control have "{T}: Add one mana of any color."
Hand size bonus:
+0
Life bonus:
-3
- Magic Online Avatars — 8 107
Bosh, Iron Golem Avatar
Vanguard
{X}, Sacrifice an artifact with mana value X: Bosh, Iron Golem Avatar deals X damage to any target.
Hand size bonus:
+0
Life bonus:
-2
- Magic Online Avatars
Braids, Conjurer Adept Avatar
Vanguard
{2}: Each player may put a land card from their hand onto the battlefield tapped.
{3}: Each player may put a noncreature artifact card from their hand onto the battlefield.
{4}: Each player may put a creature card from their hand onto the battlefield. Activate only as a sorcery.
{3}: Each player may put a noncreature artifact card from their hand onto the battlefield.
{4}: Each player may put a creature card from their hand onto the battlefield. Activate only as a sorcery.
Hand size bonus:
+0
Life bonus:
+3
- Magic Online Avatars