mtg.wtf

Deathtouch
Whenever another nontoken creature you control dies, Body Launderer connives.
When Body Launderer dies, return another target non-Rogue creature card with equal or lesser power from your graveyard to the battlefield.

{T}, Sacrifice Ghitu Fire-Eater: It deals damage equal to its power to any target.

Haste
Mentor
Prevent all noncombat damage that would be dealt to other creatures you control.
{R}{W}: Tajic, Legion's Edge gains first strike until end of turn.

Devoid
{2}, Put a card an opponent owns from exile into that player's graveyard: Draw a card, then discard a card.

As Diamond Mare enters the battlefield, choose a color.
Whenever you cast a spell of the chosen color, you gain 1 life.

As long as Archelos, Lagoon Mystic is tapped, other permanents enter the battlefield tapped.
As long as Archelos is untapped, other permanents enter the battlefield untapped.

Ward {2}
Whenever you attack, Steady Tortoise perpetually gets +1/+1. This ability also triggers if Steady Tortoise is in exile.

{T}: Add {C}.
{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Roadside Reliquary: Draw a card if you control an artifact. Draw a card if you control an enchantment.

Whenever a player casts a spell with mana value 3 or less, Eidolon of the Great Revel deals 2 damage to that player.

{T}: Choose a card name that hasn't been chosen from among Disenchant, Braingeyser, Terror, Shivan Dragon, Regrowth, and Black Lotus. Create a copy of the card with the chosen name. You may cast the copy.

Flying, vigilance, lifelink

Roll a six-sided die. If you roll a 1, Goblin Tutor has no effect. Otherwise, search your library for the indicated card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.
2 — A card named Goblin Tutor
3 — An enchantment
4 — An artifact
5 — A creature
6 — An instant or sorcery

All lands have "{T}: Add one mana of any color."
Whenever chaos ensues, reveal the top three cards of your library. Put all land cards revealed this way into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Target player reveals their hand. You gain life equal to the number of cards in that player's hand.

Irrigation Ditch enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {W}.
{T}, Sacrifice Irrigation Ditch: Add {G}{U}.

Devoid
Counter target spell unless its controller pays {4}. If that spell is countered this way, exile it instead of putting it into its owner's graveyard.

Trample
Runaway Trash-Bot gets +1/+0 for each artifact and/or enchantment card in your graveyard.

Commander creatures you own have "At the beginning of your end step, exile up to one target tapped creature you control, then return it to the battlefield under its owner's control."

Whenever a creature becomes the target of a spell or ability, return that creature to its owner's hand.

Flying
Barrow Naughty has lifelink as long as you control another Faerie.
{2}{B}: Barrow Naughty gets +1/+0 until end of turn.

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice Bronze Calendar.

Trample
Whenever Neheb, Dreadhorde Champion deals combat damage to a player or planeswalker, you may discard any number of cards. If you do, draw that many cards and add that much {R}. Until end of turn, you don't lose this mana as steps and phases end.

Choose creature or land. Reveal the top four cards of your library. Put all cards of the chosen type revealed this way into your hand and the rest into your graveyard.

For each creature, choose a number from 0 to 2 at random. Ashuza's Breath deals that much damage to that creature.

Simultaneously, all phased-out creatures phase in and all creatures with phasing phase out.